thanks for making me feel like shit

i am feeling emo today, mainly because i just broke up with king kong.
i guess some things just don't work out.

"goodbye my almost lover
goodbye my hopeless dream
i am trying not to think about you
can't you just let me be ... "






why does his picture have the effect of making me feel queasy all over?
why does seeing pictures of him smile make me miss him and long for his touch?
why does seeing him with her make me feel depressed, even though i no longer want him?
why does he have to mess with my heart, only to leave me all alone in the end?
why am i afraid of this new-found loneliness?
why does his presence haunt the emptiness in my heart?
why can't i revert back normally to who i was before i met him?

my back is turned on him, yet i am unable to control my feelings.
i despise myself.
i despise him even more.

with un-love,
bear bear